PUMPKIN PATCH MAIZE

Can anyone get enough of Sauvie Island? This summer we were usually at Kroeger's for their u-pickem berries but now that fall (and the rain) has arrived, we went a mile further to the Pumpkin Patch to check out their Corn MAiZE.

The corn is tall, really tall, and you can’t help but notice the little rhizome thingies at the base of the stalks that look like clusters of toes (corn grows this way?) and the paths are wide enough for a stroller. It seems pretty easy at first, the dead ends are obvious and the paths that lead nowhere are a gimmie. Then you get to the bridge. Fantastic! Then you get to the hard part.

After getting lost in the giant wheel of the tractor the bickering begins. "We already went that way, look! We did that! Jesus, just decide!" The little trivia cards we picked out at the beginning that give you hints of which way to turn when you reach a numbered post were whipped out. Star Navigation says: How many stars make up the constellation Lyar? a. 4 (turn left) b. 6 (turn right) c. 8 (turn left). OK, switch cards, Movies/Music/TV says: How old was country singer Dolly Parton when her first record, Puppy Love was released? OK, switch cards. Tiny Tots says: A duck says: 1. Quack (turn left).
We're not to proud -- we used the Tiny Tots.

We ate hot buttered corn with salt and pepper and homemade peach cobbler, picked a fresh bunch of flowers from their u-pickum garden for .80 cents, bought a great big bag of vegetables and pears for the week for less than $10, and will go back again.

JANTZEN BEACH CAROUSEL

We would generally not recommend anyone go to Jantzen Beach for the plain fact that it is a giant parking lot surrounded by giant big box stores that you have to take I5 to get to. But occasionally, everyone finds a need to go to Target. So if you do find yourself in this giant mall, don't miss the beautifully restored circa 1921 C.W. Parker Carousel. It harkens back to the days when Jantzen Beach was an amusement destination, not a shopping destination (which begs the definition of our culture's current amusements, but that discussion belongs on another blog).

For a dollar you can ride with your toddler on these glorious wooden horses, painted in fantasy colors, roaring, galloping, flying off into the imagination. Ruth is pictured here on one of the miniature horses, the perfect half size for your perfect little girl.

ANNA BANANAS!

Even if this were not our regular spot to trade off the kids while one or the other of us rushes off to a job, we would regularly visit Anna Banana's. Located at 8716 N Lombard, they feature outstanding coffee drinks, excellent snacks (try the cheese plate or the homemade spinach stuffed phylo) and a play area full of toys which is the perfect distraction for the toddler set. The staff is incredibly friendly and we hear they feature good music at night and feature local beers and wines but who goes out at night with two little kids under 3? Need more? Free wi-fi, warm comfortable vibe, outside seating, clean bathrooms, good cookies. We haven't visited their NW location, but will.

PHO VAN, HAWTHORNE DISTRICT

We had intended to check out the "American vegetarian" restaurant on the corner but fortunately found it closed, forcing us to stop by Pho Van. Everybody at the table agreed, it was not just the best Vietnamese we had tried in PDX, it was the best Vietnamese we had had in SF too. Loved the pho, the noodle bowl, the tofu, the salad, the coffee. The girls loved it too, and were presented with a bowl of something to nosh on within two minutes of asking. The best news of all, apparently they have restaurants all over town, a veritable Empire of Van. We look forward to visiting them all. (What is "American vegetarian anyway?)

Grant Park

The last stop on our brief NE Portland neighborhood visit was Grant Park, home turf of Beverly Cleary and setting for her books that inspired many an afternoon of adventure for Ruth's mother when she was a girl. There is a sculpture fountain located next to the playground that features Ramona, Henry, and dog Ribsy that Ruth shrieked through innumerable times. The rest of the park is lovely, well used and friendly. Tennis courts, pool, (see us there for the last Aquaducks session taking place the first two weeks of September) paths, mature hardwoods and picnic areas. This park has it all. We love NE Portland.

Rheinlander

We have come upon a (so far) winning strategy for checking out restaurants that allows us to remain in the know, save our wallets from too much damage, and most importantly, not irritate an entire dining room with the coos and screams of our young brood. We call it afternoon snack. The staff doesn't get an attitude that you are just coming in for a couple of appetizers and a split beer, the room is relatively empty, everyone has a great time and nobody's dinner is spoiled. Chefs tend to focus a good amount of creative energy on their first courses, giving you a solid overview of the dinner menu that you can't really afford anyway.

Gustav's Rheinlander, 5035 N.E. Sandy Blvd., looks like a castle from the outside. It looks like a castle from the inside too, much to the delight of Ruth. It is gargantuan, and a thorough tour found each and every dining room clean and set. Impressive. We had their mixed appetizer plate featuring schnitzel and fondu, a summer beer and two happy kids.

KRUGER'S FARM MARKET

Kruger's is only one of many U-pickum farms all over Sauvie Island, and we have yet to explore them all. Kruger's is pretty great, though. Not only do you get a really cool thing to do (not cool cool -- don't forget your sunscreen!), you get really cheap produce. And the wild blackberries, just past the rows of blueberries? Totally free.

WALLACE PARK

Wallace Park, located at NW 25th and Raleigh, is the perfect break spot for the tots when you are doing your Trader Joe's, 23rd street shopping (which, face it, is for a toddler like balancing your checkbook is for you). The Chapman elementary school located at the park helps to keep the grounds in top shape, as well as provides an additional playground structure. Something for everyone here.

Unrelated cry for help: anybody have tips on how to get a toddler, who used to look forward to her snacks and meals, to quit her fast?

CENTRAL PORTLAND LIBRARY

After hitting the saturday farmer's market downtown this morning, we made our way closer to the heart of downtown to the Central Multnomah Public Library. We are big proponents of the library system, in particular the fabuously convenient online reservation system (there's no one link, but you just log into your library card, fin your book and click 'place hold'. Voila, you will have it sent to your library within days. So cool.), and at the central branch we found a great kids section filled with banks of computers, an enormous section of easy-to-find toddler books and a reading room with regular story time for the little ones. Their site even has an online primer for the critters. How cool is that? The fact that they have a totally clean bathroom in the kids section, complete with changing table, seals the deal.

WISHING WELL

So, well, somebody said it was good. And, well, it smelled like cheap carpet in a cheap bar. Further, the spring rolls were deep fried, the size of short fat burritos. The waitress was oversubscribed and friendly, the art on the walls like nothing you have ever seen, as you can gather from the sample here. We had to go, and so we went. The thing about St. Johns that we didn't expect was the absolute genuineness of it, no irony, no post-hip anger, nothing but small town americana complete with terrible eats. We love it.

WASHINGTON PARK

The playground at Washington Park is one of the finest we have visited. There are slides, runways, swings, sand pits and a running water sculpture all geared towards your tot's heart. This alone is enough to visit, not mentioning the proximity to the zoo and museums. But enough of all that. We need to mention something that has been brought to our attention recently, namely, Ruth's dress. "Why is she in the same dress in every picture? Did you just stage everything in one day or something?" The lowdown for those of you who do not live with a girl child who notices what she wears -- the dress so often seen around town is the "princess dress." Ruth named the dress with no coaching from her parents (they dreadfully await the Barbie era) and on certain emotionally charged mornings (read: most days) she does not feel like facing the world without wearing Princess Dress. End of story.

COLUMBIA PARK

Columbia Park is a welcome oasis on the eyesore of Lombard Street. There is an excellent playground nestled in the abundant shade provided by the many Cedar and Doug Firs, a welcome break on those overly sunny days (yes, we know we will probably not be complaining of the oppressive rays come next year after the four month rainy season). This is a good picnic spot after a trip to the Interstate Fred Myers, where you can buy all imaginable consumables then go upstairs and try on a pair of Dockers. Still fresh from the city, the sheer size of Freddys strikes us like we imagine communist era Soviets being awed by stocked shelves. (oh my God! I picked up some work clothes with a roast and a melon in my cart!). We are rubes in these great spaces.

SAUVIE ISLAND BEACH

Sauvie Island, a few miles north of Portland right off highway 30 and within sight of the St. Johns Bridge, is home to innumerable farms, wildlife preserves and scenic wonder. It is also home to a fantastic beach. After you stop by one of the u-pickems to get your blueberries, strawberries, flowers, or whatever is currently in season, keep driving to the shore side and enjoy the river. Note, there is a beach, and a not-so-clothed beach. If you are shy about such things you will be mortified when the deeply tanned naked man who just finished a round of volleyball talks to you about the weather as if his wang wasn't, well, just hanging there.

GIANT PLASTIC SHOPPING CARS

The first person to get sick is also the first person to get better, coinciding with the time everyone else has caught whatever bug that took them down in the first place. When you have a toddler who is happy-healthy-bouncing, a congested baby, a chest that feels caught in a vice and sinuses that won't stop dripping, go shopping! We spent an hour slowly perusing the isles with one of these giant plastic shopping cars, which thrilled and entertained Ruth while allowing her mother and baby sister a slow-motion stroll. Thank you St. Johns Safeway.

PORTLAND BEAVERS BASEBALL

OK, we have to admit, we were sorry to be leaving the home of two major league baseball teams (and one football) but were excited to check out some minor league action at the downtown stadium of the Portland Beavers. It was cool, it was fun, but for a minor league team the prices left us thinking, what are they thinking? Since when can you not still make a gazillion dollars on cheap hot dogs? It was no wonder the stands were sparsely filled when we went for Father's day. Baseball, yes, and you can take the MAX and you can have fun, but good Lord you should be able to buy a snacks without feeling like you have to write it into the budget.

PORTLAND CHILDREN'S MUSEUM

If you are looking for a giant indoor playground (or an escape from the rain) check out the Children's Museum. We have visited several times now and have found the best days to stop by are during the week, unless you enjoy seeing toddlers completely freak out when one wants the plastic broccoli but the other needs for some reason to put said item in the freezer while yet another, soaking wet from the water room, repeatedly bangs the miniature shopping cart into the canned goods. This place is a sure fire winner every time.

MULTNOMAH FALLS

It helps to check out all the regional sights when you're new to the hood, especially when you will be having friends and family visiting with the loaded, "so what's there to do around here?" question; which really means, "so why on earth did you leave your good jobs and move here?"

Multnomah Falls, pronounced just like it looks, is pretty spectacular. Not much to do but gaze at the wonder when you have a couple of critters in tow, but even Ruth was genuinely awed at the sight. You can eat lunch at the lodge, or bring a picnic.

PATTIE'S HOME PLATE CAFE

In downtown St. Johns (8501 N. Lombard) you will find an old fashioned soda fountain and variety store that has the added bonus of having a great big box of toys for your wiggly 2 year old to play with as you wait for your bacon and eggs. The staff is incredibly friendly, quirky, and local. Outside there are several buckets for butts which suggests an AA haunt, but there is no lingering old-fashioned tobacco cloud inside. The food was what you would expect, avoid the potatoes, enjoy the sausage, read your paper and try to figure out the large glass sculpture picture hung in the window. It defies description.

JAMISON PARK, PEARL DISTRICT

New to the Neighborhood just got newer. We have relocated to Portland, Oregon where the weather is fine, the trees are lush, the kids are plentiful and we are unemployed! Until we find someone willing to pay us to show up, we will have more then ample time to find the best baby/toddler spots. Jamison Park, in the Pearl, is one of the first places we found to take a fussy toddler. Jamison Square Fountain between NW Kearney and Johnson and 10th and 11th Avenues William Jamison (which means nothing to us, being new to the hood). The fountain is a focal point of the Square, simulating a shallow tidal pool. Water cascades from stone joints into low pools.

It continuously recirculates treated water For this reason, Ruth probably should not have been body surfing in it. We were cooling off our feet when she decided it would be better to swim. Who could blame her on a beautiful summer day.

OAKLAND A's

OK, babies don't really care about whos on first or whats on second, but you can dress them up to show your home team pride and they get in free. This is key, prices have spiked at the new coliseum since they have closed off the upper deck to "make it a more intimate setting."